US Open tennis champion Andy Murray is reported to be overjoyed after his first grand slam victory virtually guaranteed him a career discussing how good or bad other people are at tennis on a major terrestrial TV network.
Scotland’s First Minister Alex Salmond was amongst those who praised the tennis player. ‘Andy Murray has joined the ranks of Sir Sean Connery and Sir Alex Ferguson in the pantheon of humourless, arrogant Jocks who’d punch you in the mouth as soon as look at you. I’m sure he has a bright future in television.’
Although the BBC refused to confirm or deny that they had already approached Murray with an offer, presenter Gary Lineker sees great things for the Scot.
‘Before Wimbledon when Murray broke down and wept like a bitch, people just hadn’t warmed to his brusque Caledonian demeanour. But since he started going all vulnerable and sensitive he’s won everything he’s touched. Seven years from now there’s no reason why he couldn’t be the face of Quavers, Wotsits, Space Raiders, you name it.’